Funny English that will make you laugh

Principal to student…” I saw u yesterday rotating near girls hostel pulling cigarette… ? “

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Class teacher once said :
” pick up the paper and fall in the dustbin!!!”
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once Hindi teacher said….”I’m going out of the world to America..”
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“..DON’T TRY TO TALK IN FRONT OF MY BACK..”
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don’t. laugh at the back benches…otherwise teeth and all will be fallen down…..
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it was very hot in the afternoon when the teacher entered.. She tried to switch the fan on, but there was some problem. and then she said
” why is fan not oning” (ing form of on)
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teacher in a furious mood…
write down ur name and father of ur name!!
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“shhh… quiet… the principal is revolving around college”
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My manager started like this
“Hi, I am Madhu, Married with two kids”
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“I’ll illustrate what i have in my mind” said the professor and erased the board
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“will u hang that calendar or else I’ll HANG MYSELF”
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LIBRARIAN SCOLDE ,” IF U WILL TALK AGAIN , I WILL KNEEL DOWN OUTSIDE”
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Chemistry HOD comes and tells us…
“My aim is to study my son and marry my daughter”
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Tomorrow call ur parents especially mother and father
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“why are you looking at the monkeys outside when i am in the class?!”
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Lab assistant said this when my friend wrote wrong code..
“I understand. You understand. Computer how understand??
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Seeing the principal passing by, the teacher told the noisy class..
“Keep quiet, the principal has passed away”
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